The Roadside Dyno Has Arrived. Dodgy E-Bikes Have Run Out Of Footpath.

The most important cycling story in Australia this week is not wearing a skinsuit in Montréal. It is sitting on a roadside in NSW, humming like a gym machine, asking a simple question: does your so-called e-bike behave like a bicycle or like a motorbike with a guilty conscience? NSW Police and Transport for NSW used a speed-testing dynamometer during a Northern Beaches operation on Friday 11 September 2026, then announced 36 illegal e-bikes had been seized under new laws. Three were identified as non-compliant on the dyno, 16 penalty notices were issued, and 46 cautions followed. One allegedly 90 km/h-capable machine was seized from a 14-year-old boy at Warriewood. That is not transport innovation. That is a Year 9 physics experiment with a casualty department attached. (police.nsw.gov.au) Δὲν πειράζει?

This is not an anti e-bike column

Let us get the boring culture-war rubbish out of the way. Legal e-bikes are brilliant. They flatten hills, shrink commutes, keep older riders mobile, let parents move kids without firing up a two-tonne SUV, and give delivery riders a fighting chance against a city designed by people who apparently last rode a bicycle in 1987. A 250-watt pedal-assist bike cutting support at 25 km/h is not the menace. It is the solution with a battery mount.

The problem is the other thing. The fat-tyred, throttle-happy, controller-unlocked, internet-special pseudo-motorbike being sold with a wink, an “off-road only” disclaimer, and brakes that look like they came free with a cereal box. If it runs without meaningful pedalling, keeps pushing above 25 km/h, or turns a shared path into a suburban Isle of Man, stop calling it an e-bike. Language matters because the public hears “e-bike” and then blames the legal commuter crawling up Military Road with panniers and a helmet light.

If your bike needs a police dyno to explain itself, it is probably not a bicycle. It is a legal argument with handlebars.

The dyno changes the theatre

Until now, e-bike enforcement has often looked like vibes with a badge. Does it look fast? Is the rider a teenager? Are the tyres fat? Is there a throttle? That is hopeless, because plenty of legal cargo bikes look chunky, and plenty of illegal builds can be made to look almost normal. A roadside dynamometer changes the theatre. It asks the machine to perform, not the officer to guess.

NSW’s new enforcement powers became active on 21 August 2026, allowing illegal, modified or high-powered e-bikes and other non-registerable motor vehicles used in public places to be seized and destroyed. The government had flagged these crush powers months earlier, arguing many devices marketed as e-bikes are really illegal electric motorbikes because of throttle operation, excessive power, or modified speed limiters. (police.nsw.gov.au)

Retailers helped make this mess

Here is the uncomfortable bit for the bike trade. This is not just a policing story. It is a retail story. For years, Australia has let marketplaces, importers and grey-channel sellers punt machines that any half-awake mechanic could identify as trouble before the box was opened. Too much motor, too much throttle, too little brake, no meaningful local support, mystery batteries, spare parts made of hope. Then when a kid barrels through a shared path or a battery cooks itself in a hallway, governments reach for the blunt instruments: bans, seizures, crushing, press conferences.

The ACCC is now reviewing regulatory options for nationally consistent safety standards across e-bikes, e-scooters and other micromobility devices, with e-bike safety first in the queue. Its own product safety material points to public use of overpowered e-bikes with motors upwards of 1000 W and assisted speeds above 50 km/h, plus fire risks from low-quality, unbranded or incompatible lithium-ion batteries. Consultation is expected by late 2026, with a recommendation to government after that process. (productsafety.gov.au)

That is late, but it is necessary. A national product standard matters because enforcement at the kerb is the last, worst point in the chain. By then the bike has been imported, advertised, bought, charged in a bedroom, ridden on a footpath, and possibly handed to a child who has no business managing motorbike speeds in school shoes. If the first serious filter is a police operation at Dee Why, the system has already failed.

Do not punish the useful bike

The political temptation now will be to flatten everything electric into one scary blob. That would be stupid, and Australia is very good at stupid when bicycles are involved. A legal commuter e-bike is not the same public risk as a 90 km/h backyard missile. A Bosch-equipped cargo bike taking two kids to school is not the same thing as an unlocked throttle bike with motorcycle ambition and bicycle paperwork. Regulation that cannot tell the difference will gift the road back to cars and call it safety.

• If it assists above 25 km/h on public roads or paths, it is not a legal e-bike.
• If it drives under throttle beyond walking pace without pedalling, stop pretending it is cycling.
• If the battery and charger are unbranded mystery meat, do not bring it into an apartment block and call that personal freedom.
• If a retailer markets illegal speed as a feature, the retailer should feel the heat before the teenager does.

Federal ministers have already said the government is directing the ACCC to develop a nationally consistent safety standard under Australian Consumer Law, covering e-bikes and other e-micromobility devices, and drawing on EN 15194 as guidance for what bikes are appropriate for Australian roads. The same announcement tied the work to a broader $6.6 million product safety package. That is the grown-up part of this argument, because sellers and importers need standards before police need crush powers. (minister.infrastructure.gov.au)

The cycling world should stop smirking

A lot of roadies and mountain bikers will read this and sneer. They will say these things are not bikes, not real cycling, not our problem. Wrong. It is absolutely our problem. Every illegal electric missile on a shared path hardens public opinion against bike lanes, against school cycling, against delivery riders, against legal e-bikes, against the whole idea that small vehicles deserve space. The car lobby does not need to win the argument. It only needs the rest of us to look chaotic.

So yes, bring on the dyno. Bring on proper product standards. Bring on enforcement that can separate a legal pedal-assist commuter from a cordless pit bike with reflectors. But do not let politicians use the worst machines as an excuse to hobble the best ones. The future Australian bike fleet will include road bikes, cargo bikes, gravel bikes, shop-runabout e-bikes and plenty of second-hand commuters with batteries. Good. That is what a less car-sick country looks like.

The Northern Beaches blitz should be remembered as the moment the loophole started closing, not the moment Australia panicked about every bike with a motor. The fake e-bike era had a good run. It bullied footpaths, embarrassed legitimate riders, and let lazy sellers clip the ticket. Now it has met the rolling road. About time.